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I was the captain of our cargo ship when, all the sudden, pirates overtook the ship. They gave us a choice to either go overboard in the middle of the ocean, or take an X-Change and join their crew. At the end of the day I at least got to keep my hat.

Captain, are you sure this is going to improve crew morale? 😳

As the the captain being naked and vibes help with crew morale

Spanks and Nipple bells help with catching fish. As a captain I do what need to keep the crew happy ;)