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If a female human flashes her tits in the forest, but is wearing camo, do her boobs exist? (F, 39, married, 2 kids, pondering deep philosophical thoughts.)

I’m just a mom waiting for socially distant hockey practice to finish. (F, 39, married, 2 kids, yes - they have to wear masks and there is no contact, thank fuck parents can’t go in, and am happy to entertain myself for an hour outside the rink.)

In honor of my parasites returning to school, here is a special Science Saturday video. Life lesson: you can have fun and learn too. They are not mutually exclusive. (F, 39, married, 2 parasites, loves going to the grocery store alone.)

We’ve made it past Monday to the shittiest day of the week. Here’s a fitting prize, a SFW video. (F, 39, married, 2 kids, exhausted, unsure as to the real day of the week.)

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Tits gif

It’s been such a shitshow quarantine day that I’m just getting 2 minutes to upload a video. tldr: science, tits, finger sucking. (F, 39, married, 2 parasites, somehow so busy but not going anywhere, crappy WFH-er, mediocre summer camp counselor, science b

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Tits gif

The one where I almost got caught. Prison is not a good place during a global pandemic. But...my home is also a prison. (F, 39, quarantined with a stressed husband and 2 mini dictators.)

The kids won’t stop fighting today. I’ve gotten 13 minutes of work done. No idea what is for dinner and the house is a shithole. This car is my sanctuary. God bless my Honda Odyssey. (F, 39, married, 2 warring parasites, mediocre WFM-er, spectacular takeo

I’m just a mom waiting in the car for her kid to finish socially distant karate. Nothing to see here. (F, 39, married, 2 kids, tired, wfh-er, enjoys silence.)

Tits gif

Tits gif

Tits gif

Sunday Science Lesson: Based on my last analysis, videos in the minivan front seat are a hit. This is take 2 of 3. I’m posting a the other takes on r/momsgonewild and r/asiansgonewild with a few different variables. Let’s see which one does better. Hypoth

Sunday Science Lesson: Based on my last analysis, videos in the minivan front seat are a hit. This is take 1 of 3. I’m posting a the other takes on r/gonewild30plus and r/asiansgonewild with a few different variables. Let’s see which one does better. Hypo

Sunday Science Lesson: Based on my last analysis, videos in the minivan front seat are a hit. This is take 3 of 3. I’m posting a the other takes on r/gonewild30plus and r/momsgonewild with a few different variables. Let’s see which one does better. Hypoth

For fuck’s sake, I just need exactly 7.5 minutes of alone time. I just need one orgasm to ensure I can survive today with no quarantine induced homicides on my permanent record. #lowquarantinegoals (F, 39, 2 parasites, 1 husband, and no privacy)

Apparently, I get work release from my current pandemic imposed prison to go to Home Depot because my #firstworldproblems parasites won’t sit outside without an umbrella. Ripping off my ankle tracker and making a run for it. New Zealand? Join me?

If pants are optional during quarantine, then bras should be too. I fully support feminists in the #nobramovement. Do you support free tits?

Just need to slip this of[f] for a second...

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